This is our growing list of silly recruiting messages. Use them at your leisure.
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If you ever looked at a feast platter and wondered “Where the fuck did that fruit come from?” then you might just belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>. #ScaryMagicCitrus #TheIngredientsDontMakeSense
If the raiding style of <The Flat Azeroth Society> is too slow, too relaxed, or not pushy enough for you we totally understand. There are plenty of hardcore raiding guilds happy to take you and treat you like shit. #RaidingShouldn'tSuck
Do you ever wonder what idiot decided to reuse the WoW icons so much? <The Flat Azeroth Society> would love to know who it was so they can have a nice “chat” with them. #StupidChoices
If you find it morally questionable that the Kalu'ak have us kidnap Wolvar pups in order to “save” the species then you might just belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>. #WalrusWrongs #TuskarrTerror #Kalu'akAreKidnappers #PupsAreSoCute #CanIKeepIt
If you would be upset that some triffling gnome yoinked you out of your home without your consent then you just might belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>. #JaraxxusWasRightToBeAngry #FizzlebangWasAnArrogantFool #HerosDoAllTheHardWork
<The Flat Azeroth Society> WTS: [Tears of Loot Grinding], [Robes of low Expectations], [Tome of Newb Herding], [Shield of drama reflection], [Potion of Endless Sarcasm], [Gloves of Confidence], [Axe of Ninja Slaying], and [Raid Leader's Whistle].
In <The Flat Azeroth Society> we keep trying to learn to be patient. But we just don't have the time for that shit.
We chose the name <The Flat Azeroth Society> because <Unherdable Cats>, <Annoyingly Nice>, <Inventory is Full>, <We Wipe Often>, and <Perpetually Undergeared> were all already taken.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> thinks that the thing we miss the most from future expansions is that we don't get to beat the crap out of Garrosh. #NotMyWarchief, #IdiotLeader, #DoesAnyoneActuallyReadThese, #IllidanWasRight.
Why should you join <The Flat Azeroth Society>? Because it actually exists. Not like The Elder Scrolls 6, which probably won't come out before we all die of old age.
At <The Flat Azeroth Society> we like our games hardcore! Like Palia, Cat Goes Fishing, Sky: Children of Light, or Stardew valley! Er, wait, those games might be too rough for us...
I wouldn't say <The Flat Azeroth Society> “hates” Minigob Manabonk. I mean he could be worse, at least he's not always saying, “Do you get to the Cloud District very often?”, or “Let me guess... Someone stole your sweetroll...”
Ever stop to wonder how we can stuff 1000 arrows into the same space that one tiny ring on our finger takes up? Yeah, this is the kind of pointless crap <The Flat Azeroth Society> thinks about.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> doesn't think there is any issue with the water quality in Undercity. Once you get past the hideous green color, the putrid smell, and the fact it makes you retch, it's just fine!
Anyone notice how in ToC5 Tirion and all the leaders just sit there as Jaeron Sunsworn gets brutally murdered? <The Flat Azeroth Society> noticed. #RememberJaeren
On a serious note, <The Flat Azeroth Society> is looking for raid leads. Especially in EU and Oceania times. We have willing raiders, but none that feel confident to lead. If you feel you could do this we would be thrilled to have you. Thanks!
<The Flat Azeroth Society> believes that quitters never win, winners never quit, but those that never win and never quit are just stupid.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> is looking for core raiders and raid leads that feel low drama is more important than fast progression.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> doesn't think Warmane has any bugs. I mean, it's kumpleetlee nohmahl 4 thees gaim two bee awl fuhked yup, reit?
<The Flat Azeroth Society> is LFM: ABS40, ECU&ICE no BHP ESC+TCS (GTO & FORD SUV RESS 50PR, NO USR OLY) lvl 90+ /w gs, achoo, awd & lcv, wtf, wtevr, lol.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> doesn't usually abandon pugs in the middle of a run, but when it does it's because the tank can't hold aggro, the dps don't know what to attack, the healers are out of mana, and the mobs are laughing at us!
If you notice “Crewman Stembolt” on the zeppelin from Trisfal Glades to Howling Fjord and wonder if he is 'self-sealing' you might just belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>.
Did you level up your cooking just to get Baby Spice to use on people blocking shit with their mammoths? Then you might fit in with <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
In <The Flat Azeroth Society> the only people we can't stand are the ones that post every damn thing on the AH as a single item. Things do stack you know...
Do you help Alliance characters you see trying to finish [School Of Hard Knocks]? If so <The Flat Azeroth Society> salutes your kindness! Join us today to make Azeroth a better, and flatter, place!
Do you make sure to take your Orphan to Challe's “Dark Orphanage” during childrens week so they know what happens to the bad kids? If so you might belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
<The Flat Azeroth Society> is here for all of us that need therapy, but can't afford it, so we play video games instead.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> is now selling portals from Dalaran to Orgrimmar, Undercity, Thunder Bluff, Silvermoon, Shattrath, and even Tanaris! Helping you with all your travel needs! (Stonard coming soon!)
<The Flat Azeroth Society> thinks bards are weird. Wizard: “I got my powers from long study”, Fighter: “I got my skills from hard training”, Cleric: “I get my power from my god”, Bard: “I made a joke at a goblin once and it dropped dead”
In <The Flat Azeroth Society> we can resist anything, except temptation.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> has decided to have a free giveaway to celebrate hiting 1000 members! Go to http://free.theflatazerothsociety.com/ and tell us what we have in stock that we can send to you! Thanks!
Come join <The Flat Azeroth Society>! Why? Because we're so big we had to make a leveling guild, <The Kinda Flat Society>. (We named it that because <Heifers of Uddercity> was taken)
Did you take Engineering just so you could use the auction house in Dalaran? If so you just might fit in with <The Flat Azeroth Society>
<The Flat Azeroth Society> believesh in abshtainning frum all alcohol. Aht leasht, we will shtart doing that tomorrrow! ...hic!
<The Flat Azeroth Society>, where we truly understand why we use the [Lovely Charm Collector's Kit] to make love charms from the mangled remains of our murder victims.
<The Flat Azeroth Society>, where you can get all the free hot troll feet pics you ever wanted! (Tauren hoof pics are not free however, sorry.)
<The Flat Azeroth Society> Has rich hot goblin princes and princesses that want to meet you! All they need is some gold loaned to them so they can buy passage here!
<The Flat Azeroth Society> wants to see a mud wrestling match between <Sluts of Silvermoon> and <Tramps of Darnassus>
<The Flat Azeroth Society> has learned that trying to make chill relaxed players interested in raiding is like trying to motivate cats high on catnip. The upside is when they do raid they do it with very little drama.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> is looking for more healers to come be bored with us on guild raids because our tanks are not stupid.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> is looking for more tanks to come make our healers bored on guild raids by not being stupid.
Come be part of <The Flat Azeroth Society>, where we believe that cheese is a loaf of milk, beer is liquid bread, and cereal is a cold soup. However we draw the line at putting pineapple on pizza.
In <The Flat Azeroth Society> we do dungeons the old fashioned way. You know, slowly.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> likes to put +int enchants on warrior weapons. Because we want the weapons to at least be smart enough to listen.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> tried to search the internet for a list of weapons Hunters shouldn't roll on. The result was, 'page not found'
<The Flat Azeroth Society> sees a similarity in Rogues and newbies. They both pick locks.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> once saw two warlocks meet at the crossroads. They feared each other. And were never seen again.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> once threw all it's paladins in a lake and called it a 'bubble bath'
Rogues should come join <The Flat Azeroth Society> School of Roguery. (Totally not stolen from Lonika Stillblade of course) where we train in combat looting, blaming someone else for breaking polymorph, and not using feint.
<The Flat Azeroth society> thinks Necromancers get too much hate. They're just trying to raise a family.
<The Flat Azeroth society> is glad we had this chance to talk to you. You see we have been trying to reach you about your Wind Rider's extended warranty...
Looking for a more active guild? Well <The Flat Azeroth Society> has hit the 1000-member guild cap (600+ have been online within the last week) and we have between 25 and 65 people online at any given time. Come get your social game on with us.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> is looking for Molten Core raiders! 8.5k+ GS, must have [What A Long, Strange Trip It's Been], only looking for undead druids and belf shamans. Thanks!
If you ever chose to keep or level a character just because of where it was located in the login character list you might just belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>.
Do you think that being a good person makes you much more of a badass than the number of raids you have won or how many players you have killed? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> would love to have you.
If you ever realized that the city of Dalaran is much, MUCH bigger than the crater it left behind you just might belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>.
Looking to raid where others do all the setup, recruiting work, and gear themselves while you just show up? Well, that's not us. But if you think raiding is a journey and experience to be shared <The Flat Azeroth Society> would love to have you.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> is working on it’s raiding teams. Needing NA and EU raiders. If you are looking to help others and yourself with endgame please consider joining our strange brand of humor. Thanks!
Have you bought fast flying and only an hour later noticed you forgot to buy a fast mount? Have you ever wondered why your DPS was terrible only to realize you were fighting with your fishing pole? Then you belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
Do you enjoy being part of the long mounted conga lines walking around Dalaran? You might enjoy <The Flat Azeroth Society>.
Do you remember the days of mobbed servers when 50 people were trying to get the same quest kill with both fondness and revulsion? Then you might belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>.
Looking for a normal guild? Well keep looking, cuz <The Flat Azeroth Society> is a bunch of weirdos!
Are you crazy enough to play this game alongside your significant other? Then the <Flat Azeroth Society> is the place for both of you.
Are you here to relive the times in WoW when you enjoyed the game? Back when you played alongside cool friends? Back when you were young and life felt fun? Oh wait, that's why i'm here... Well, join <The Flat Azeroth Society> anyway.
<The Flat Azeroth Society>, We PvP sometimes, we kinda Raid, we run Heroics sometimes, mainly we just run around in ugly tabards and act silly.
Old Guild! <The Flat Azeroth Society> is a PvE guild that does Battlegrounds 24/7. We are a Spanish guild looking for Swedish members who speak Chinese with a Russian accent. Ventrilo is a must! No guild tabard, as it doesn't match my hairstyle. Thanks!
Have you ever been working on a daily quest for 20 minutes, only to realize you were still in the Wintergrasp Raid group? If so you just might fit in with <The Flat Azeroth Society>.
Are you just starting out? Feeling pressured to not die? Got tiny bags overflowing with junk? Well, if you can mash buttons and engage in reasonable conversation then <The Flat Azeroth Society> will accept you.
Looking for the best PvP guild? With the best fighters, ready and willing to teach you how to beat the Alliance? Well, we’re not that guild, but if you want a group of laid back folks to chat with <The Flat Azeroth Society> might be for you.
When you leave a human NPC and they say “Safe Travels...”, do you immediately think, “...land strider”? If so you might belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>.
<The Flat Azeroth Society> can offer you... uhm... well... we have a tabard! And... uh... people that talk sometimes! Plus we... uh... hrrm... We have a guild bank full of newbie stuff! :D
My girlfriend said that if I didn't leave <The Flat Azeroth Society> she would leave me. Well, at least I'm not getting interrupted when I play anymore.
I try to recruit for <The Flat Azeroth Society> with innuendo laden messages. But it's hard.
Men, <The Flat Azeroth Society> has had a massive influx of beach-tanned smoking hot ladies for you to meet, and they all want to know you! Come join for super good times! (Ladies, watch for the other half of this ad)
Ladies, <The Flat Azeroth Society> has an influx of highly trained dentists (who are just totally jacked) and need companionship! Come join us for super good times! (Gents, watch for the other half of this ad)
Love Drama? Do you like being screamed at by 16yos for being 2mins late to a raid? Prefer to do your fighting on the keyboard instead of against the Alliance? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> IS NOT the guild for you!
Can you mash glowing buttons repeatedly? <The Flat Azeroth Society> will accept you.
Here at <The Flat Azeroth Society> we have the finest Pandaren beer, cigars imported from Draenor, and spices from Argus that will blow your mind better than a Goblin rocket! Join us and make the best worst decisions in the game!
<The Flat Azeroth Society> is recruiting. We're a guild that does things and sometimes does other stuff. You can join us or not; I'm not your boss.
Looking for the best PvE guild? with the most competent raiders ready and willing to teach you their tricks? Well, we're working on it, but if you want a group of laid back folks to chat with <The Flat Azeroth Society> might be for you.
Do you have more hate for yourself than for the Alliance? Do you enjoy complaining at everyone else in Wintergrasp? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> IS NOT the guild for you!
Do you enjoy ganking alliance newbies? Is your day filled with trying to find new ways to make your opponent cry? Do you find joy in trolling people? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> IS NOT the guild for you!
Have you ever played Wintergrasp so stoned or drunk that you forgot you were defending and tried to break down the walls of your own fort? If so <The Flat Azeroth Society> might be the place for you!
Are you looking for friends that will laugh at the ragers in Wintergrasp with you? Look no further than <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
Are you the type of person that enjoys doing the professions and filling the guild bank up with crafted things nobody ever uses? Do you have several accounts just to mule all your extra junk? <The Flat Azeroth Society> might be the guild for you!
Looking for a less serious guild without drama? Looking for folks to talk to so you're not playing alone? Looking for people that won’t judge you because you suck at PvP? <The Flat Azeroth Society> might be for you!
Do you agree that Goblins are just Orcs that were never vaccinated? Do you read the flavor text on quest items? Do you stop to read the books in dungeons? Do you care about achievements? If so you might fit in with <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
Are you tired of listening to all the crap on the Global or Trade channels? Looking for a better source of conversation? Looking for helpful people? <The Flat Azeroth Society> might just be the guild for you!
Do you go through zones wondering why the designers gave no thought to structural engineering? Perhaps you noticed how the lids to the guild bank vaults in Orgrimmar don’t fit the bases? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> might be for you!
Do you take part in the Argent Tournament because you actually think it's fun? Did it take you 90+ days of /played time to have your first lvl 80? Do you think leveling is more fun than raiding? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> is for you!
Trying to decide if [City of Light] or [The Caverns of Time] is the worst quest in the game? Do you do [The Green Hills of Stranglethorn] because it’s fun? Then you might belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
When you were new did you get on the wrong blimp only to find yourself in Northrend? Do you /love all the critters you meet? Did you level cooking just to have Critter Bites? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> has a place for you!
If you find yourself dealing with the soul-crushing depression of playing hundreds of arena battles and never winning you might belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
If you're the kind of person that waves at an Alliance member peacefully fishing in Orgrimmar and leaves them alone then you probably belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
Have you ever wondered how we have steam-powered robots and yet still beat each other up with swords? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> might be for you!
Have you been fishing for Old Crafty for years? And the idea of trying to catch Old Ironjaw makes you weak in the knees? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> is the place for you!
Do you wish Murlocs were tameable? Do you think it's wrong that Worgen can't be skinned? Do you want a “/punt” emote for gnomes? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> might be for you!
If you ever find yourself wondering how people got wagons into Dalaran when it has no city gates you might belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
Ever pondered how it's unfair we can talk to Alliance NPCs but not PCs? Then <The Flat Azeroth Society> might just be for you!
If you ever asked for a burger in Thunder Bluff you might just belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
Do you hope to raid someday but it's not your first priority? Or perhaps you are afraid to raid because you just know you’re going to stand in the fire and get laughed at? Come join <The Flat Azeroth Society> today!
Are you still working on [The Loremaster] achievement? Perhaps you’re doing [Insane in the membrane]? If so you might belong in <The Flat Azeroth Society>!
Have you ever been banned from a video game for being “too old”? Do you miss the “good old days” of retail when you got your first mount at level 40 and your first flying mount at 70? If so you should join <The Flat Azeroth Society>.
Why is <The Flat Azeroth Society> so unique and chill? Well, it was founded by an engineer that retired super early and PvE multiboxes over starlink while living in a van in the middle of the forest. (No, seriously)."